Among these, he states, are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. Those are words upon which our nation is founded. Understanding exactly what those three pillars of a humanist democracy mean is up for much debate.

Who doesn't like to start off an essay by quoting such a highly-regarded wordsmith as Thomas Jefferson? I wrote those introductory paragraphs several days ago, and now that I'm coming back to finish, I'm tempted to delete them. It's a bit cliché.

In any case, there they are.

Nobody is guaranteed Happiness, just the right to pursue it. The government does nothing except control Liberty, even in the effort to protect it. Of course, the government's protection of those liberties is necessary for the stability of society. Assuming the people in control don't delude themselves into thinking they grant liberties instead of protecting those inherent to us as humans, government is a good thing.

Life. That is the tricky one. We do, after all, put criminals to death after due process of law; have legalized abortion; and kill in times of war. Sometimes we (as a government and a nation) even sanction murder outside of the law.

All of those instances, though, are concerning post-conception lives. Do the yet-conceived have the same right to life? Given that they have yet to be Created, it is easy to argue that they do not. They have not yet been endowed. Are we guaranteed the right to reproduce? It is likely that this would be one of those God-given liberties. We're born with genitals-- why should the government tell us that we can not use them for their intended purpose? (I, of course, do not use mine for their intended purpose, but that is another story.)

I have been saying for some time that the key to sustaining human civilization is limiting the growth of population. This is one of those cold equations that we don't like to think about, but is true, nonetheless.

Sure, you can call me an Ebenezer Scrooge. He was definitely a downer, but when he said, "If they'd rather die, then they had better do it and decrease the surplus population. Good night, gentlemen," he was letting us in on the dirty urban secret: too many people is a bad thing.

He had plenty of evidence right before his eyes, though. His hometown of London was undergoing rapid growth during the Industrial period. The population of the city of London was booming, along with the factories that spewed poisons into the air. The crowded quarters led to outbreaks of sickness and disease. All of those people in one place were a bad thing.

Not only is there a detrimental physical effect from high population densities, but there are psychological effects as well. In discussing John Calhoun's famous Malthusian experiments on the social effects of high population densities in mice and rats, a Stanford University researcher commented, At a population this dense, man would be extinct.

What did Calhoun, and others since him, discover? There is a critical mass, a tipping point, at which social order will break down into chaos. We need only to look at crime rates in our modern cities, where resource distribution is extremely uneven, to see the foreshadowing of a greater crises.

We do not yet know-- and should wish never to find out-- how high the population density of human societies must be before anarchy ensues. I don't want to be a doomsday prophet and say it will happen tomorrow, but it is something we must plan for-- that we must actively work to avoid.

So far, we're headed right for disaster.

There is only one way to prevent such a global disaster: stop making babies.

This concept is presented in dystopian novels like The Wanting Seed, 1984, and Brave new World. In these works of fiction, one aspect of the bleak future is the limitation of reproductive rights. In a slightly different vein, The Children of Men presents the idea as an imposition of nature. Like the fish and frogs who can change gender depending on the needs of a group, our genetic code responds to sociological and psychological forces to keep humans from having children. And maybe P.D. James was onto something there-- the number of births per woman has decreased from 5+ in 1950, to just over 2 in 2000. Maybe nature itself is staving off the descent of man into beast. Despite such a drastic reduction in births per woman, the population still climbs.

Even with the help of nature, we must put forth some kind of effort to limit the population to a number sustainable by the resources we have. Americans are repulsed at the very idea of limiting births. As a nation, we look down upon the Chinese One Child policy as barbaric. The Chinese are right, and we are selfish. It is the nature of all creatures to spread their genetic code to as many offspring as possible. Without this drive, evolution would not occur and a species would likely die out. As humans, however, we also have the desire to raise ourselves up from our animalistic beginnings. We are better than the beasts. We create laws to help deter us from acting on our beastial impulses-- that is the very definition of society. This one particular desire, though, we cannot seem to rise above.

It is China which has once more brought the issue to the spotlight. As part of their proposals to the climate summit in Copenhagen, the Chinese government noted that population growth control must be considered when developing environmental policy. Again, they are right.

Dream #1
While hiking in the forest, I encountered a river. From my approach, the bank of the river was about level with the river itself. There seemed to be quite a volume of water moving along at a good clip. Not like a rushing Alaskan river fed by melting snow, but not like a lazy, meandering plains river, either. Somewhere in between.

The opposite shore of the river was actually a very steep cliff, about 30 to 40 feet in height. Atop the cliff's edge was a row of village buildings parallel with the river. There was a slight man-made extension on the cliff, as a form of overlook and walkway. It was supported by ropes and vines.

I am not sure how I crossed the river, but the dream cut to me walking (and at times crawling) along the edge of the overlook. I remember looking down to see the river below. The overlook wasn't very wide. There was maybe 10 feet of space between the edge of it and the buildings facing the river.

One of those buildings was a breakfast restaurant. It had some egg-based name-- Scrambled or something like that. The name was painted in big yellow letters on the large pane-glass store-front window.

On the door was a little cowbell that jangled when I went inside. The place wasn't very big. Just a few tables and a small window where you placed your order. The place was full. There was a two-seater couch by the door on which you could sit while waiting for a table. Though I recognized no one else in the restaurant, one of my coworkers was sitting on the couch. (I won't name them here.)

They motioned for me to come sit beside them and handed me the menu. Since the couch wasn't very large, we were sitting pretty close together. My coworker was being a bit more friendly than I expected, putting their arm around me and leaning in close. They told me they owned the restaurant and that the food was good. As they handed me the menu to browse, they started touching me a lot, attempting to kiss me. I told them that we were coworkers and it would be inappropriate. Then I woke up.

I wonder if the dream would have continued if I'd not said no...

Dream #2
While putting groceries into (or out of) my car, a van carrying three strange men drove up beside me. Like a kidnapping scene in a movie, the sliding side door of the van opened up, a couple of men jumped out, and then shoved me into the van.

Knowing that putting up a fight against three guys would get me nothing but pain, I stayed calm and offered no resistance. I asked for confirmation of the obvious, "Are you kidnapping me?"

"Yes," one of them answered.

"Are you going to ask my family for ransom?"

They replied, "$50,000. That should support us for month or so."

I thought $50k a month was a pretty big budget. It was obvious that these guys weren't just looking for rent money. Then I begin to wonder where my family would get the cash. I at first thought they'd mortgage their homes, but then I realized they would go to the police. The police would deliver marked bills so the bad guys would be caught. I knew it'd be a dangerous few days for me as all of this played out.

After driving for a bit, we arrived at a gigantic brick mansion. I could see no other buildings or homes around the place. The yard was expansive-- probably 10 acres of rolling lawn surrounded by forest. It had the feeling of one of those religious cult compounds. There were dozens of kids playing outside. When we arrived, they all ran up to greet us. Some feeling of assurance came over me then. I was sure that people who would care for this many kids surely wouldn't hurt me and were simply looking for money.

What happened from here, I am unclear about. I do recall that I had some amount of freedom around the place. They did take my phone, and kept an eye on me, but always from a distance.

After some time, I discovered in the basement of the home a room that appeared to be some kind of science lab. White walls, brightly lit, microscopes and various paraphernalia on the black counters. I could not enter through the locked windowed door, but I saw through it a clear tank full of some kind of fluid, and a large human fetus. It wasn't dead. To the contrary, it had an umbilical cord attached, connecting it to something atop the tank that I couldn't see. They were growing humans.

Still trying to wrap my head around what I'd just discovered, a felt a hand on my shoulder. One of my captors had found me. He didn't seem angry, but he too stood looking into the lab, at the unborn fetus.

"Why do you have me here," I asked.

"$50,000." His clever smile told me that he knew that I didn't believe him.

"You are doing genetic experiments here."

"Yes, but we still need $50,000." He was all nonchalance about revealing his group's intentions. It seemed as if he believed it would all go down as planned, and my knowledge of it would have no negative consequences, but it freaked me out. I'm sure the shock was visible on my face. He just smiled and walked away.

Maybe they were naive; maybe they were stupid; maybe they were crazy. Well... I knew they were crazy.

As soon as I could, I managed to locate my phone and activate the GPS on it, and then attempted to call my family. I was quickly discovered, and my phone confiscated once more, but the damage was done. They knew bad things were coming. They all started preparing, packing things into trucks and vans, gathering up children. It was too late, though. Within minutes, I could hear helicopters and sirens. SWAT vehicles raced down the drive. In the confusion, I began running towards the rescuers. There were about 50 or so kids and adults running around, fleeing the house.

I saw an ambulance-type vehicle. One of my captors, the same one who told me of the genetic experiments, was going back and forth from the house, carrying boxes to pack into the vehicle. While he was in the house gathering more things, I saw in the back of the ambulance three containers-- the ones containing the fetuses. On impulse, I quickly broke open the containers and used a nearby box to destroy the unborn babies.

After putting an end to the mad-science work of the my kidnappers, I continued my escape, running to my family which I saw standing all together behind the rescue vehicles.

Then I woke up.

To help you identify the 5 elves in the video, reference the still image before pressing play:
Top Left: Karsten (The White One!)
Bottom Left: Eduardo
Center: Charles Anthony
Bottom Right: Reimon
Top Right: Stephen

Since I was already working on converting the site, I also revamped the visual appearance of the blog. A new narcissistic background and header, along with a neater. Just those couple of changes make a huge difference!

There are still a few minor things to work out, but those should be done later today. Send me comments and suggestions! (You'll notice the comment form is still awaiting updating.)

Unfortunately, the more environmentally and cost-friendly Fusion Hybrid, which is rated for a combined 39 MPG, was a bit out of my price range at an MSRP of $28,350. However, the manual transmission (which I prefer) Fusion SE was much more affordable, and still achieves a respectable 29 MPH on the highway-- with user reports of 33 MPH combined and 36 MPH highway. That is a 37% improvement in fuel consumption and gas emissions. Given my driving habits, that represents an estimate fuel savings of $1,000 per year. Whoo hoo!

Not to mention my two-day bargaining session got me a pretty good deal on the Fusion. After showing myself to be a terrible negotiator with my Wrangler, and the Tacoma before it, I refused to surrender until I got the best deal I thought possible.

The coolest thing about the car, besides the increased fuel efficiency, is the SYNC system. It connects to my Pre via bluetooth, allowing me dial hands-free by simply saying, "Phone. Dial," and then saying a name from my phone's contacts, or a number. It also has a USB port into which I plug a flash drive or other USB memory device, onto which I've put MP3s. Then I can say, "USB. Play artist Elvis Presley," and The King fills the cabin through the stereo system. Additionally, I get 6 month of Sirius satellite radio. Free!

I chose the Atlantic Green Metallic paint job, with Camel interior. I am not sure why the shade of green is called Atlantic, because it can easily be mistaken for black unless the sun is shining directly on it.

I've never named a car, and I probably won't name this one, but I am considering it. I'm not sure why most Americans use feminine names for their vehicles. The SYNC voice is female, though. Her name is Samantha. She is my fag hag who'll never get pregnant and move away.

While most of the conversations consist of variations of, "I miss you," then, "I miss you, too," or, "Look what I did today," followed by, "Wow! I wish I was there!," there are the occasional moments of spirited discussion in which I school everyone on the finer points of history.

For example, here was an exchange on Columbus Day:

Uncle #1 Happy Columbus Day! Say a little prayer for me today!
October 12 at 4:07am · 15 Comments · Like

Sister Whatcha got going on today?
October 12 at 4:09am

Friend of Uncle #1 good luck love ya
October 12 at 4:17am

Uncle #2 I have my fingers crossed forya!
October 12 at 4:41am

Friend of Everyone I SAID A PRAYER! I LOVE YOU!
October 12 at 5:04am

Karsten Columbus Day is Evil.
October 12 at 10:35am

Uncle #2 Why is Columbus Day evil?
October 12 at 1:48pm

Karsten:
For several reasons:

1) Columbus was not the first European to discover or settle the Americas. (He didn't even make it to what is today Mexico, Canada or the US.) That honor belongs to Leif Ericson, who established a settlement in Canada 500 years before Columbus set sail.

2) Columbus, immediately upon his arrival, began slavery in the New World. An excerpt from a letter Columbus wrote to the financier of his voyage, Queen Isabella, "With fifty men we could subjugate them all and make them do whatever we want." The ones he didn't use as forced labor on the islands, he shipped back to Europe as slaves.

3) Columbus didn't know where he was. Until the day he died, Columbus thought he had made it all the way to the east coast of Asia-- hence the term "Indians" for the natives.

4) Even the Europeans who came to settle Hispañiola (today Haiti and the Dominican Republic), where Columbus landed and was appointed governor by the Spanish crown, knew he was a bad guy. For his cruelty, they arrested him and shipped him back to Spain. Not surprisingly, they do not celebrate Columbus Day.

So why do we celebrate Columbus Day? Some (most) will say it's because he discovered the New World, which is inaccurate. Others will say that he initiated the flow of European culture to the Americas. That part may be true, but as much as I like living here, that 'culture' came at a great expense to many of the people that were already here. Others will say that it's because of tradition, that 'we always have.' That is inaccurate, also. It did not become a federal holiday until 1934. Here in Nevada, it's still not a legal holiday.
October 12 at 3:22pm

Friend of Everyone WELL AINT YOU SMART..
October 12 at 3:24pm

Uncle #1 I didn't ask for all that [Karsten]. I just wanted to wish everyone a happy day - what crap you got on Christmas you bah humbug.
October 12 at 4:42pm

Karsten [Uncle #2] asked. I answered.
October 12 at 5:05pm

Uncle #1 Just play'n. You know if all our libraries burn to the ground at least we will know where to come for info. :)
October 13 at 3:34am

Uncle #2 Some of that I did not know.
October 13 at 5:19am

Friend of Everyone I DIDNT KNOW ANY OF IT. I HATE HISTORY
October 13 at 7:49am

Friend of Everyone WE LOVE YOU [Karsten]... NOW ACCEPT ME AS A FRIEND!
October 13 at 7:50am

Uncle #1 dang [Friend of Everyone] - you needing the validation? - hahahaha! Just kidding darling.
October 13 at 5:35pm

Understanding the present is impossible without putting it into historical perspective, and I enjoy educating people about history.

With that in mind, the same uncle who began the Columbus Day conversation carefully wished me a happy Thanksgiving:

retard. But I love you. Have a happy thanksgiving - if you celebrate it. :) - I am sure there is some story behind how it wasn't really the native americans and the pilgrims, but some government conspiracy to make peace with the "red man and white man.

Of course I celebrate Thanksgiving!

I am very thankful for pumpkin pie; for turkey; for football; for holiday pay; and for not being taken to jail for whatever I might be guilty of.

While it is certainly noble of us to commemorate the spirit of cooperation between the Natives and the Pilgrims, there are probably very few Americans who send a thank-you card to the Wampanoag tribespeople who still reside in Massachusetts.

Our Puritan forefathers, upon running out of beer, disembarked from their ship, carrying their Geneva bibles (What?!? No KJV?!?) and too-few supplies. Ill-prepared for the New World, they began starving, and suffering death by freezing. But ye-ha! Along came some brown people (the aforementioned Wampanoag) to save them.

All saved. Now lets kill them.

I'm sure the Natives regret helping us out, but I'm still gonna eat my damned pumpkin pie.